Good Monday, Gamer!
“You can discover more about a person in an hour of play than in a year of conversation.” — Plato
I’ve been rolling dice for more than four decades now, and somehow, the games still surprise me. At 54, I’m thinking a lot about what it means to carry this hobby—and this craft—into my 60s. I’m not the new kid at the table anymore. I’m the cranky old-head person with the beat-up GM screen, too many notebooks, and a head full of campaign scars. And yet, here I am, still sketching new worlds, still chasing that feeling of discovery.
When I was younger, gaming was about escape. All-night sessions, bad pizza, and the thrill of maps unrolling across the table. Now it’s about endurance. What keeps me going isn’t the grind of XP charts or proving I can run a 12-hour dungeon crawl (I can’t). It’s the people. The laughter when the dice betray you, the hush when the narrative turns, the shared myth we spin together. If forever-GM is a thing, I’m your huckleberry!
Gaming IRL
In-person games have become precious. My weekends, or local pickup games are so much joy— sitting at the table, hearing dice clatter, seeing friends react in real time—that’s magic you can’t patch into a Zoom call.
Game conventions are part of this too. I’m not chasing the Big Box cons anymore. I’d rather be in a small venue, where play feels personal, conversations run long, and you can sit down with folks who aren’t trying to rush through an event schedule. Big shows have spectacle; small shows have engagement. At this point in life, I’ll take engagement.
Gaming Online
Online play has been a lifeline. I wouldn’t be running half the games I do without it. It’s amazing to see how tech has evolved, or retro-fitted to serve us, gamers. The joy: I can connect with players across states, across countries, across time zones. I can play new-to-me games with folks who “get it,” even if they live a thousand miles away...Thomas!
The challenge: online play demands a different rhythm. It’s harder to read the table. Harder to hold focus. Sessions need to be shorter, sharper. Breaks matter. Tools matter. But even with those hurdles, online play lets me keep rolling dice when in-person isn’t possible. It’s not second best—it’s different. And it’s part of how I’m moving forwards.
Building & Dreaming
On the design side, this past quarter looked like this:
Lifted: Indomitable slogging through layout, edits, and art.
SecretKC crossing 370 subscribers, even as referral growth slowed—now I’m learning new ways to grow it, and rediscovering the magical local nightlife.
Diceology Patreon retooling, with open-table campaigns and podcast plans on the horizon.
Indie dev tinkering: solo narrative dice prototypes, card-based hacking runs, Kuiper Belt musings, astrology character making.
My many different doors into the same room: the room where play happens.
Relocation & Reset
In a year or two, I’ll be relocating. Kansas City has been good to me, but I’m already scouting what’s next: maybe Vegas, maybe Chicago, maybe Colorado— any Atlanta folks out there?!. The idea of planting new roots is both exciting and exhilarating. Will I find new tables to play at? New communities to plug into? Probably. Gamers are everywhere. But it’ll be a reset, a chance to see how play evolves in a new city.
II
So what does a second act look like for a neo-grognard gamer? For me, it’s doubling down on play. Building games, yes. Publishing them, yes, but also carving out space to play more—to sit at tables, online or in person, with whoever’s ready to roll.
Thanks for allowing me to muse aloud.
ICYMI — An Appendix N of sorts…
Sean McCoy — Sean’s been dropping sharp, useful reflections on RPG design and publishing. Always worth a read if you care about the craft.
Keith Senkowski — I met Keith IRL at Burning Wheel Con a couple of years ago, big presence, extremely fun to game with. Keith’s newsletter feels like sitting down with an old friend to talk games and zines. Good vibes, good reads, fantastic art. If you’re in the TB life…You Know!
Bastionland — Chris McDowall continues to show us how to get into the odd! Mythic Bastionalnd 4Evar!!!
Skeleton Code Machine — Game dev, systems, and thoughtful essays. If you’re into building and breaking games, this is for you.
Sarah Doom — Sarah’s been writing and talking about play, design, and community in ways that stick with me. Follow her work if you aren’t already; you’re missing out.
Indie RPG Newsletter — A curated roundup of indie RPG happenings, always catching stuff I miss—a great way to stay informed.
Gityanki Diaspora — Judd has been in the trenches for years, and his Diaspora posts consistently deliver perspective and practical takeaways. He’s not TPK shy.
Indie Game Reading Club — Paul Beakley’s long-form campaign write-ups and analysis are still some of the best thinking about play out there. I need to get my old cranky ass out to visit him. Been an age.
Thanks for reading, playing, and supporting the strange stuff.
What's the line between Big Box Con and small venue for you, Jay?